jeremy lavine el niño essay - video version

by chance I came across a video on youtube with the documentary version of jeremy lavine's el niño essay, I didn't like in fact, neither the narrator with his "adult" voice nor the drawings & the things they represent, that often happen when you read a book then go to see the movie adapted on it, usually you prefer the book & the images you made in your head to what the movie makers imagined & realized.

well, who knows? some people would like, maybe if I get some time (& a better internet connection) I'd make & upload a video with my own drawings & my voice emulating jeremy's :p I really think it would be much better ... place to the video :)

for fun review: girlfriend 7.0 v.s. wife 1.0

another must read!

these two e-mails are to make you rofl!, well, maybe not all of you, some women could not find them funny at all! and some of them would think the only reason I'm posting them for is sexism or something in that kind.

in fact the reason is just they are hiiilllaaaaarious!!! that's all, and then, I like to post interesting stuff in my blog. if it was something about men, I would do the same.

well, I think most of people have enough sens of humor to enjoy this, so have fun, and if you know anything that makes fun of men, don't hesitate to post it in a comment! :)

now, place to the real content, two weird messages most likely made by a creative guy & are supposed to involve two crazy individuals ...

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0.

I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 ,Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Golfing 3.6.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 . Please help!

Thanks,

Troubled User.....

now the reply our "troubled user" got from the "tech support":

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE! because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0!



WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,

Tech Support

weird art ... again!

this is another site I came across with weird art work in it, this time it's about design, & this time it really looks like art to me, not like those duvet covers messed up lol! but still it's strange art that gives you some unusual feelings, I'm especially talking about these two works:

messed up

no cloning!

they look like victor frankenstein's work from various organic parts, no?

the collection of works & designs is on 3visuals.com, enjoy them while listening to an original tune, plus learn more about chakib lounes the creator.

there's also an older post on a another strange site from mr. stupid.

what sort of bizarre art is this?

I understand it's not supposed to have any sort of logic as it's a "work of art", but the problem is that I can't see anything artistic in it either ... it's just something weird & confusing, I can't see the beauty of art in it, or let's say, I can neither see the way it's intended to stimulate my senses & mind nor the emotions it should be transmitting to me?

I'm talking about three photos from eight made in a series for the magazine mode depesche n°5, january 2007, cologne, the full series was published on gneborg.org (try to explore the site, there are many other interesting works).

to be honest it only succeeded to make me laugh! I'm I missing something? is it my art insensibility? or is the matter all about the art work itself?

we are scammed! everywhere!

note: if you are bored seeing this long article & just want to see some weird & funny pictures, go directly to them; to those willing to read it, big respect & thanks in advance! :)

first what's scam?

one of dictionary.com meanings:

-noun
1. a confidence game or other fraudulent scheme, esp. for making a quick profit; swindle.
–verb (used with object)
2. to cheat or defraud with a scam.

I've been surfing the internet for a while now doing various things, & I have the strange feeling that 90% of other surfers are scammers; scammers are everywhere, sending emails, posting in forums, running blogs & even owning websites, sometimes big & expensive websites.

but what about off-line scam? I guess real life scammers are as numerous as internet scammers, after all, scammers on the internet are also real people with real lives too, but maybe they have more freedom on the web, as they can act anonymously from anywhere & reach anyone, anywhere; do their stuff and disappear then reappear under a new identity & so on ...

but I can prove though real life scammers actually exist! they sell you plain bread with the price of delicious sandwiches!

pictures

now, are all scammers humans? in fact no! at least on-line, it's proved there are "scammers-bots", some of those steal your passwords & some even your money; it's true they are commended by humans, but still they are (ro)bots.

again, do inhuman scammers exist in real life? not sure, but at least I'm sure inhuman scam exits! sometimes, you are presented to a nice big watermelon, but once opened, there's not much to eat!

picture

oh!!! this kitten is sooo cute!!!!!! :x :x :x

I know I sound like a girl, but that little kitten is so cute & lovely, I don't know why I imagine it saying something?! & the the way its staring is ... original? only it makes me like the picture, although the other two animals are supposed to make it interesting.

hey! we are all dumb!

I mean we all who asked google how many horns were there on a unicorn, that's the topic of a post on some blog, it's called People is stupid too. - Dumb things people search for.

I don't deny it is dumb, but you can realize it's not that dramatic when you know the reason behind it, people weren't wondering about the number of unicorn horns, they were just checking out what google had to say ...

post author wasn't obviously aware of the fact that if that search query was made that popular, it was first, because of previous similar cases in which google gave clear answers to less or more philosophical inquiries (one of them was the answer to life, the universe and everything!!!); the second reason is the the big popularity of social bookmarking sites, on reddit for instance the query got a lot of success published under the name: Google answers another important question.

well maybe all that doesn't excuse doing search on unicorns horns & writing articles about them, it's still dumb anyways I guess, but sometimes it's good to take a rest of smart & intellectual things, & just try to be cool & to have fun, am I wrong?

ps: to understand this post better you my check my post on unicorns horns.

now lightning knocking down trees?

a second great article from the genius little kid jeremy lavine, he's still talking about dangerous natural phenomenons, after el niño, this time he analyzes lightning!

if you read his essay on el niño, you certainly remember how much he cares about dying people & burnt trees, almost the same with this second article, except trees are not "burnt down" but "knocked down" ...

below are the textual then graphic versions of the hilarious article, I didn't highlighted trees passages this time, but others I found interesting, have a good laugh!

Lightning!!!

What is lightning? Where does it come from? What does it mean? Does it have a meaning? Where does it come from? What is it made of? Is it made of light? Some might say it was made of light.Others contend that lightning is made of fire. that killed people and knocked down trees. Before Benjamin Franklin. Benjamin Frankling was a founding father. He fatherly founded that lightning is made of electricity. Electricity in the sky.

But what of the Greek myths, of the Greek god Zeus and of the popular image of Zeus - a Greek God - throwing down lightning bolts to kill people and knock down trees. Where did he find the time?

And what of lightning being made of fire? In this workaday world in the era of founding father Benjamin Franklin we have nor patience for such concerns. These are for the third world and schizophrenics.

Some people do not understand that lightning is destructive. They ignore the wisdom of their elders and of the founding father Benjamin Franklin. They think lightning is a lie perpetrated by people with a vested interest. At their own peril!!! Lightning kills people and knocks down trees!!! It a power of destruction exercised by the Greek god Zeus, the mightiest of Greek gods!! But they do it: they ignore such wisdom and taunt the powerful exercise of destruction and they worship their idle gods and stand near trees. At their own peril!! Lightning has the killing power to kill people and the destructive power to knock down trees! When you stand near trees, they will be knocked down by lightning and you will be killed by lightning! There is no escape. Lightning will knock down the tree and knock down your soul. Trees are tall.

Many things are tall. Many things attract lightning. But do the two correlate? A recent study says yes. It says that being tall and attracting lighting do correlate. That means that being tall corellates with being struck by lightning. You die when you are stuck by lightning, and your tree is knocked down.

Some people try to measure lightning, they take measurements of it. They use balloons and rockets and their imagination and determination and research money and they put it all in the mixing bowl and they mix storms - storms with lightning - and so they mix in the lightning and then they get the product if they're lucky of measurements about lightning from the storm? What kind of measurements? We may never know ...

as for el niño paper, jeremy got another unfair 10 out of 100 from his teacher, & a good remark on his "rambling" & "babbling", check it out in the graphic version below (click to enlarge).

jeremy lavine: genius essay on el niño

this is another manifestation of children genius, it's an assay written for school by a kid named jeremy lavine, other than his name and the masterpieces he made, nothing is known about this child, below are text & graphic versions of his paper on phenomenon el niño.

the passages I highlited are amusing, because the ideas in them are repeated several times, seems, for jeremy, they hold the most important messages of his article.

Coming in like El Niño

El Niño is spanish. It is the spanish word for child. Like all things spanish, it is dangerous. It kills people and burns down trees. This child is more than a child. It really isn't a child at all. It is a storm. A deadly storm that kills people and burns down trees.

Warm water usually builds up around australia to somewhre else, namely to other places. Where are these places? These are places that also have water, but water that is usually not as warm water El Niño moves to these said other places. These other places are to the east. Of the water.

In Peru, they have many names for many things. One of the things they have names for is for people who go fishing, go fishing to make a living. If we had a word for this kind of people that word would be "fisherman". But we don't. In Peru, they have different names for things than we do in America. They call that kind of people "pescadores". That's Spanish. That's what they speak in Peru. When El Niño comes, these "pescadores" can't catch any fish. El Niño is caused when the Peruvian gods get angry. They have been angry for millions of years and have made El Niño for millions of years. Many many moons ago, the Peruvians committed human sacrifice to satiate their gods and end the flood that was caused by El Niño. In today's modern dog-eat-dog work-a-day world of scientists, diplomats, McSalad Shakers, and George Bush Jr., we no longer have access to such solutions. We are too proud. We will not commit human sacrifices. We refuse to satiate the Peruvian gods. Thus, they remain angry and keep killing us and burning down our trees with El Niño.

Instead of satiating the gods, many of these "scientists" have tried to control El Niño with "science". They put up expensive fish-attracting-bueys that run on flashlight batteries. Imagine, fighting the power of the gods with flashlight batteries! Needless to say, this didn't work and everyone died.

the graphic version below contains the teacher's view, she (I don't know why I'm sure she's a woman) particularly liked the passage about "dangerous spanish things", the mark she gave jeremy was 10 out of 100, personally I don't agree with that, but geniuses are often misunderstood, you know ...

click to enlarge

talking about the genius of kids, here's another proof of it: give half a proverb to a child, watch the result ....

car on wall or graphic illusion?

click to enlarge

first when I saw this map on google maps, I didn't believe it was actually a car on wall but a graphic illusion as what I'm often seeing lately, an illusion made especially to trick satellites; if you don't get what I mean, you may want to check some of the great 3d graphic illusions on tricks & illusions.

in fact it's actually a car parked on a wall! well, it's not defying gravity laws, but an art work by theo van laar in the town of den haag / netherlands, below are two interesting photos of it by harry van reeken:

the "spider car" photographed from earth


looks very beautiful viewed at night

see also the car on google maps clicking here, or click here for a view on google earth

you may want to see also google earth view to the largest "marry me" ever.